Stress is a normal part of life that calls people to rise to their best, but what happens when anxiety builds and stress begins running you? Are you a stressed out mom?
Between juggling a career, marriage, personal life and health, we can sometimes start feeling overwhelmed…especially when it comes to being parents! I have had my own share of “moments” that I am not proud of when it comes to being a mom. There has been, on more than one occasion, where I was working on my laptop rushing to get some things out when my adorable daughter came in and wanted to play, and it resulted in my snapping at her to let mommy work. Of course, not a moment later a wave of guilt wafted over me and I made amends by putting my work on pause so I could spend a few minutes with her. I try not to punish myself for being human, but sometimes it can’t be helped. Deep down inside, I really am doing the best that I can as I am sure most moms are doing the same!
The bottom line is this: moms can be quite stressed out, especially when they don’t have time to take care of their own needs first. And when a mom is stressed out, that emotional reverberation can be felt in all that she does and by all those around her. So what can we do to be less stressed as moms, and more present with our bundles of joy? Before we get there, let’s take a look at some of the things that stress us moms out!
How Stressed Are Moms?
In a 2013 study performed by Today.com and Insight Express, the online survey completed by some 7,164 American mothers reports the following:
- 46 percent of moms say their husbands/partners cause them more stress than their kids do;
- 72 percent of moms stress about how stressed they are;
- The biggest cause of stress: 60 percent say it’s lack of time to do everything that needs to get done;
- Nine out of 10 moms stress about staying fit and attractive.
On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the most stressed, the average mom in this survey puts herself at 8.5. What about you? How stressed are you on a daily basis and what is the thing that stresses you the most?
What Is the Culprit of All This Stress?
When a mom is stressed out this doesn’t necessarily mean she is a bad mom. If anything, the daily toils of keeping a clean house, being financially stable, spending time with family while being healthy and working on our careers can make ANYONE a stress ball. But at the same time, our children do often suffer for it when they have done nothing wrong.
What is the culprit of this stress? In my opinion, it is wanting to have the “perfect” life. I feel that a lot of women put unnecessary stress on themselves to “have it all.” When we mentally and emotionally burden ourselves, we take it out on our children in a variety of ways such as snapping at our child without reason, we are less likely to be present to them and their needs and because we don’t nip our own stress in the butt, our children may even start mimicking our behavior and start stressing out themselves.
I have always been a stickler for time: if I am not 10 minutes early to a meeting then I am running late in my mind. This was fine until my daughter started stressing herself out (and everyone else around her) when she wasn’t early to school every day. This was a great wake-up call for me to get my stress under control lest my daughter burdens herself the same way I do!
What Can Moms Do To De-Stress?
After seeing first-hand how my stress impacted my daughter and our relationship, I started taking my own emotional well-being very seriously. Here are some of the things I do to de-stress. Keep in mind that de-stressing is a matter of preference: what works for me may not work for the next person. The key is to make de-stressing a part of your daily routine so that you can be a happier, healthier mom!
- Meditation – 15 minutes a day can do wonders. If you don’t have 15 minutes a day, then give yourself an hour of meditation!
- Yoga – yoga is a great way to de-stress, and relieve tension from your mind and body.
- “Me” time – scheduling daily “me” time, even if it is only 15 minutes or so, supports moms in finding their sanity before or after a hectic day. My “me” time is scheduled in the evenings.
- Pamper yourself – while I would love to get a massage, mani and pedi every day, my wallet and schedule forbids it! But every now and then it is nice to treat myself to a day out, and I am not the only one who benefits from it.
- Hobby time – find a hobby where you can express yourself. Whether it is reading a book, taking an online Spanish class or painting, giving yourself space to express is really really helpful.
- Ladies’ Night Out – One thing that benefited me tremendously was having a Ladies’ Night Out. There is something about getting with a group of awesome women, connecting and having fun with them. I daresay that it can be healing. Check out our monthly Ladies’ Night Out for $25 by registering for our next event in Springfield, MIssouri here.
In summary, the airlines had it right when they tell us to put the masks on ourselves first before our children: if we are not happy, centered and self-sustainable we can’t really be there for our kids mentally, spiritually and emotionally. The best way I know how to de-stress is to take care of yourself first…even if it sounds a little selfish, I assure you it isn’t. Even supermoms need a little R&R!
Wishing you happy parenting experiences!
We are WeDames: an online women’s magazine, or women’s Ezine, and women’s community based out of Springfield, Mo. We love connecting, having fun and empowering women in and around our awesome little city. We do this by publishing lifestyle, parenting, business and local happenings here, and by also hosting women’s events that support local businesses in and around Springfield, Mo. Ladies’ night out is our flagship event, and is an excuse for us ladies and mom’s everywhere to leave the kids with daddy, to get dolled up, look your best and hang out with other amazing women in Springfield, Mo.
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